REM - "monster album" Tablature

@ALBUM: MONSTER
last revised 11/11/94
@SONG: WHAT'S THE FREQUENCY, KENNETH?
(album version)

"What's the frequency, Kenneth?" is your Benzedrine, uh-huh
I was brain-dead, locked out, numb, not up to speed
I thought I'd pegged you an idiot's dream
Tunnel vision from the outsider's screen
I never understood the frequency, uh-huh
You wore our expectations like an armored suit, uh-huh

I'd studied your cartoons, radio, music, tv, movies, magazines
Richard said, "Withdrawal in disgust is not the same as apathy"
A smile like the cartoon, tooth for a tooth
You said that irony was the shackles of youth
You wore a shirt of violent green, uh-huh
I never understood the frequency, uh-huh

"What's the frequency, Kenneth?" is your Benzedrine, uh-huh
Butterfly decal, rearview mirror, dogging the scene
You smile like the cartoon, tooth for a tooth
You said that irony was the shackles of youth
You wore a shirt of violent green, uh-huh
I never understood the frequency, uh-huh
You wore our expectations like an armored suit, uh-huh
I couldn't understand
You said that irony was the shackles of youth, uh-huh
I couldn't understand
You wore a shirt of violent green, uh-huh
I couldn't understand
I never understood, don't fuck with me, uh-huh

@SONG: CRUSH WITH EYELINER

I know you
I know you've seen her
She's a sad tomato
She's three miles of bad road
Walking down the street
Will I never meet her?
She's a real woman-child
Oh my kiss breath turpentine

I am smitten
I'm the real thing (I'm the real thing)
Have you seen her come around?
My crush with eyeliner

I'm imbibed
I'm infatuated
It's all too much passion
She's all that I can take
What position should I wear?
Cop an attitude? (Fake her)
How can I convince her? (Fake her)
That I'm invented too, yeah

I am smitten
I'm the real thing (I'm the real thing)
We all invent ourselves
and you know me

Yeah, she's a sad tomato
She's three miles of bad road
She's her own invention (She's her own invention)
That gets me in the throat
What can I make myself be?
Life is strange, yeah (Life is strange)
What can I make myself be (Fake her)
To make her mine?

I am smitten
I'll do anything (I'll do anything)
A kiss breath turpentine,
my crush with eyeliner

I am smitten
You know me (Yeah, you know me)
I could be your Frankenstein
my crush with eyeliner

I am smitten
I'm the real thing (I'm the real thing)
Won't you be my valentine?
My crush with eyeliner

@SONG: KING OF COMEDY

Make your money with a suit and tie
Make your money with true denial
Make your money expert advice,
If you can wing it
Make your money with a power ply
Make your money with a buyout bribe
Make it lie as long as you mean it

I'm not king of comedy,
Grease the pig, give a squeeze (squeeze me)

Make your money with exploitation
Make it holy illumination
Say a prayer at every station
Don't forget to ask for mercy
Make your money with a pretty face
Make it easy with product placement
Make it charged with controversy
I'm straight, I'm queer, I'm bi

I'm not king of comedy,
I'm not your magazine,
I'm not your television

Make your money, make it rich
make it young and make it quick
Make your money on the jukebox, baby,
let's pick up sticks
Make your enemies make your moves
Make your critics stumble through
Make it smart and make it schmooze
Make it look easy

I'm not king of comedy,
I'm not your magazine,
I'm not your television,
I'm not your movie screen
I'm not commodity (all together now)
I'm not commodity
I'm not commodity

@SONG: I DON'T SLEEP, I DREAM

I'm looking for an interruption,
do you believe?
You looking, did my dreams
Be prepared for anything
You come into my little scene
Hooray hooray hip hip hooray
There's one thing I can guarantee:
You won't have to dig, dig too deep

Said leave me to lay, but touch me deep,
I don't sleep, I dream
I'll settle for a cup of coffee, but you know what I really need

Are you looking to drive my dreams?
You here to run my screens?
You come, deliver my demons
Hooray hooray hip hip hooray
Are you coming to ease my headache?
Do you give good head?
Am I good in bed?

I don't know, I guess so
I don't sleep, I dream
I'll settle for a cup of coffee, but you know what I really need

I'm looking for an interruption,
can you believe?
Some medicine for my headache
Hooray hooray hip hip hooray
I'm pitching for a new direction
Pinch me when I wake
Don't tell me my dreams are fake
you leave me to lay, you touch me deep,
I don't sleep, I dream
I'll settle for a cup of coffee, but you know what I really need
Leave me to lay, but touch me deep,
I don't sleep, I dream
I'll settle for a cup of coffee, but you know what I really need

@SONG: STAR 69

You don't have to take the bar exam to see
What you did is Ignoramous 103

Where have I got to hang my hat
you don't have line to me
all this just to be your friend
I was there to tell you
extortion and arson, petty larceny

I know you called. I know you called. I know you called.
I know you called. I know you called. I know you hung up my line.
Star 69.

I know all about the warehouse fire.
I know squirrelies didn't chew the wire.

Three people have my number, the other two were with me.
I don't ________ to I'm not your patsy.
This time you have gone too far with me.

I know you called. I know you called. I know you called.
I know you called. I know you called. I know you hung up my line.
Star 69.

Why'd you put your quarter down on me?
This reads like some dark Inside Edition, Hard Copy.
I can't be your character witness, I can't be your alibi.
Don't arrange the FBI, here the spy versus spy.
You my friend are guilty as can be.

I know you called. I know you called. I know you called.
I know you called. I know you called. I can't be your alibi.
Star 69.


@SONG: STRANGE CURRENCIES

I don't know why you're mean to me
when I call on the telephone
and I don't know what you mean to me
but I want to turn you on, turn you up, figure you out, want to take you on

These words, "You will be mine"
These words, "You will be mine, all the time"

The Fool might be my middle name
But I'd be foolish not to say
Going to make whatever it takes,
ring you up, call you down, sign your name, secret love
Couldn't I take you in and make you mine?

These words, "You will be mine"
These words, "You will be mine, all the time", oh

I tripped and fell, did I fall?
What I want you to feel, I want to feel it now

You know with love come strange currencies
and here is my appeal:

I need a chance, a second chance, a third chance, a fourth chance,
a word, a signal, a nod, a little breath
just to fool myself, catch myself, to make it real, real

These words, "You will be mine"
These words, "You will be mine, all the time", oh

These words, "You will be mine"
These words haunt me, hunt me down, catch in my throat, make me pray,
say love's combined, oh

@SONG: TONGUE
(posted by Michael Stipe to rec.music.rem)

call my name, here I come.
90 to nothing, watch me run.
you call.
I am ashamed to say.
ugly girls know their fate.
anybody can get laid.
you want a room with a fire escape.
I want to tell you how much I hate this.
don't leave that stuff all over me. it pains me.
please just leave it.
I should toss that vanity license plate.
toss that make-up painted face.
box those poems, chocolate cake.
scratch that name on the record player.
please just leave me be.
don't lay that stuff all over me.
it crawls all over. all over me.
call my name, here I come.
your last ditch lay, will I never learn?
caramel turn on a dusty apology.
it crawls all over me.
you turn all over.
it pains me.
please just leave it.

@SONG: BANG AND BLAME

If you could see yourself now baby
It's not my fault
You used to be so in control
You're going to roll right over this one
Just roll me over, let me go
You're laying blame
Take this as no, no, no

You bang, bang, bang, bang and bang,
blame, blame, blame
You bang, bang, bang, bang and bang,
It's not my thing so let it go.

If you could see yourself now baby,
the tables are turned
the whole world hinges on your swings
your secret life of indiscreet discretions
I turn the screw, leave the screen,
Don't point your finger,
You know that's not my thing

You came to bang, bang, bang, bang and bang,
blame, blame, blame
You bang, bang, bang, bang and bang,
It's not my thing so let it go.

You've got a little worry,
I know it all too well,
I've got your number,
so does every kiss-and-tell
who dares to cross your threshold,
happens on your way,
Stop laying blame.
You know that's not my thing.

You know that's not my thing,
You came to bang, bang, bang, bang and bang,
blame, blame, blame
You bang, bang, bang, bang and bang,
It's not my thing so let it go.
You bang, bang, bang, bang and bang,
blame, blame, blame
You bang, bang, bang, bang and bang,
It's not my thing so let it go.

You kiss on me, tug on me, rub on me, jump on me,
you bang on me, beat on me, hit on me, let go on me,
You let go on me.

@SONG: I TOOK YOUR NAME

I wore the clothes you wanted
I took your name
If there is some confusion,
who's to blame?

I signed your living will
I smiled your face
I'm ready to close the book on
NASA and outer space

If there is some confusion
who's to blame?
who's to blame?

I sequenced your arrival
I sealed your fate
I pushed the button
and erased your master tape

I wrote the sales pitch
I threw the grey switch
I dragged your big-assed
dirty robbed car out of that ditch

If there is some confusion
who's to blame?
who's to blame?

I crossed your great divide
I stirred your ocean's tide
I called your bluff until
I blew your circuits wide

I'll be your albatross,
devil dog, Jesus Lord
I don't wanna be Iggy Pop
but if that's what it takes

If there is some confusion
If there is some confusion
If there is some confusion
who's to blame?
who's to blame?

@SONG: LET ME IN

Yeah, all those stars drip down like butter,
in promises, a sea.
We hold out our pans, lift our hands to catch them.
We eat them up, drink them up, up, up, up

Heyyyyyy, let me in.
Heyyyyyy, let me in.

I only wish that I could hear you whisper down,
mister fisherman, to a less peculiar ground.
He gathered up his loved ones and he brought them all around
to say goodbye, nice try.

Heyyyyyy, let me in. yeah yeah yeah
Heyyyyyy, let me in. Let me in.

I had a mind to try to stop you. Let me in. Let me in.
I've got tar on my feet and I can't see.
All the birds look down and laugh at me.
Clumsy, crawling out of my skin.

Heyyyyyy, let me in. yeah yeah yeah
Heyyyyyy, let me in.
Heyyyyyy, let me in. yeah yeah yeah
Heyyyyyy, let me in.

@SONG: CIRCUS ENVY

Here comes that awful feeling again
Welcome the ugly animal.
I hold my breath to what you sing,
My pyro b-ba-ba ball and chain,
I'm not afraid, I messed it, messed it, messed it, messed it up

I've got my telescope head in the haystack
I'm getting tired of your dodgeball circus act
Put pepper in my coffee, I forgot to bark on command

Here comes that awful feeling again
Make way for monster jealousy
The strong man kicked sand into my breakfast cereal bowl
I'd spelled your name with Oatios,
he messed it, messed it, messed it, messed it up

I've got my telescope head in the haystack
I am tired of your dodgeball circus act
Put pepper in my coffee, I forgot to bark on command

(you're mean, mean, mean
you tease, tease, tease me)

If I were you I'd really run from me
I'd really really wish that I were you
When I get loose I'll climb a tree
and drop a load on your head
This monster in me makes me retch, you messed it, messed it up

I've got my telescope head in the haystack
I am jealous of your dodgeball circus act
Put pepper in my coffee, I forgot to bark
Put pepper in my coffee, I forgot to bark on command

(you're mean, mean, mean
you tease, tease, tease me)

Do you smell jealousy?
Do you smell jealousy, jealousy, jealousy?

@SONG: YOU

Let the sun beat through the clouds,
Let me kiss you on the mouth.
All my childhood toys with chew marks in from a smile.
Let me hold your syrup close to mine.
Let me watch you, Hollywood and Vine.
And I want you like the movies, touch me now.
I love you crazy, just keep on.
I love you madly, just keep watch.
You wipe my lips,
You turn me on.
My attentions are turned to you.

Did I dream you were a tourist
in the Arizona sun?
I can see you there with luna moths
and watermelon gum.
I woke up in the sleeping bag,
With nowhere else to run.
You're standing in the bathroom
telling me its all in fun.
I love you crazy, just keep on.
I love you madly, just keep watch.
You wipe my lips,
You turn me on.
My attentions are turned to you.

I can whisper in your ear.
I can write a calendar year
I can wing around your Saturn smile, shut out the moon
I walked the tension wire line.
And I learned to disrespect the signs.
And I want you like a Pisces rising, even though
I love you crazy, just keep on.
I love you madly, just keep watch.
You wipe my lips,
You turn me on.
My attentions are turned to you.


(copyright R.E.M./Athens, Ltd. 1994)